Refueling After Burnout - Athens Area Women's Summit
December 15, 2021
Welcome to the Annual Athens Women’s Summit!
We pulled into the Historic District of Nelsonville, Ohio, and parked on the square outside of Stuart’s Opera House, where the Athens Women’s Summit would take place. Jade Borden, my best friend and roommate, and I walked in, nervous.
My freshman year RA was there, checking women into the event. “Here, take a free Athens Women’s Summit mask!” they motioned towards the masks after checking our names off the list. Just seeing a familiar face helped ease my nerves. Just breathe, Zoe, I told myself. One woman handed us our name tags. On the back, it said our sessions for the day:
Session 1: Generating Energy
Session 2: Align Your Money with Your Values
Lunch and Headshots
Session 3: I Am Worth Defending
Yes! I thought. I got all of my top choices! Jade and I walked towards an empty table and sat down. There were four other OU students here, and we chatted until the President of the Athens Area Chamber of Commerce, Dani Underhill, introduced herself. “Welcome and thank you all for coming!” she said. A deaf interpreter signed along as she thanked all of the sponsors that made this event possible.
Around the room, one hundred women applauded. Women from all walks of life were here. Today, I’d get to meet college students and working professionals, retired women and college professors, out-of-towners, and locals. All women were welcome here.
Session 1: Generating Energy by Layla Sweet
After a couple of wrong turns and a flight of stairs too many, Jade and I found our first session room: Generating Energy by Layla Sweet. Immediately upon entering, we saw tables with framed quotes. Layla was in the Air Force, is a certified life coach, and a mom. We were excited about this session. Having lived together for a year and a half, we each knew how desperately we needed to generate energy and maintain a work/life balance. Layla told us about the importance of physical energy, emotional energy, mental energy, and spiritual energy.
As we talked about each type of energy, we discussed at our tables where we lost and gained energy in our lives. After the session, Jade told me, “Going into this, I really wasn’t sure what to expect, but I am so glad that I went because there were some topics discussed that I feel are often hard to admit are happening in life… It was nice to see that other women also have the same issues.”
Layla continued by sharing that deep breathing helps with sleeping, calming yourself down, and your energy levels. She recommends scheduling exercise and meditation.
One of the most surprising parts of her session was when she talked about mental energy. She said, “Raise your hand if you’re a multitasker. C’mon!” She then said that those that multitask actually “spend 25% more on tasks than if we did one at a time.” Whoops, I thought. Multitasking is actually counterproductive. She suggested setting a 30-minute timer to do one task at a time and to turn off work notifications on your phone.
Then came her greatest piece of advice--and take a second to actually write this out. I swear you’ll see a pattern.
- Write a list of what your priorities are. As a college student, probably keeping up in classes, hanging out with the important people in your life, and giving yourself a brain break are a few priorities.
- Now, look at your calendar and see where your time is really spent. Do your values and priorities line up with what you spend the most time on?
For me, most of my time is spent on homework and not nearly enough time with the important people in my life. As I reevaluate, I’m figuring out how to balance work and friends. Layla shared that making these changes is not immediate She said, “Over time, you can generate more energy.”
Session 2: Align Your Money with Your Values by Michelle Wilson
Jade was in a different session from me for session two, so I’d have to brave this one on my own. I re-entered the room to hear from Michelle Wilson, a financial advisor at Athens Impact Socially Responsible Investments.
Michelle started the session, “We want to be socially responsible, but we’re busy.” She then broke down the ways in which women--everyone, really--can begin investing in socially responsible organizations with the help of a financial advisor.
While some of the language was beyond my grasp, the overall advice was to start with ESG to screen investments. ESGs, standing for environmental, social, and governance, are similar to SRIs--Socially Responsible Investments. ESGs give organizations a framework for measuring whether or not they are being socially responsible. When you have narrowed down organizations based on their ESG score, you can choose which organizations align with your own values based on what organizations are left. Make sure, Michelle said, to still invest in every segment of the market for maximum profits.
Lunch break
When that session ended, we all went to lunch. Before I spilled anything on myself--as I do--I ran upstairs for my professional headshot. The photographer was up there with her camera and a giant white umbrella to help control lighting. I was so excited to have a quality photo for LinkedIn and resumes, rather than my current photo on Portrait Mode taken in my front yard at home in Cleveland. The photographer was such a hype woman. “Yes, you have such a pretty smile!” she told me. After she snapped a few shots, I ran back downstairs to eat more before the third session began. During the lunch break, I bumped into my new friend, Veronica Hallis, an OU student that was also attending the Summit. “Hey!” we quickly said before each going to our third session.
Session 3: I Am Worth Defending by Rebekah Mendez
The third session was called “I Am Worth Defending” and was taught by Rebekah Mendez, co-owner and instructor at One Academy. One Academy specializes in jiu-jitsu, yoga, and Muay Thai. She teaches people young to old and especially loves teaching the Women’s Self Defense courses. She taught us the 5 foundations of physical self-defense:
- Be aware and trust your intuition
- Use distance management. You want them to be too far or too close to you.
- Set boundaries; distance management is useful here. Rebekah said, “Most attacks can be stopped by boundary-setting alone.” They can? I thought. That’s wild. I’ll have to be better about that.
- Conserve your energy and assume that they are bigger and stronger than you--rely on technique, not on pure muscle.
- Use effective techniques, like jiu-jitsu.
Now, the really mind-blowing part: the foundations of mental and physical self-defense, are *drum roll please* the exact same as physical self-defense. To protect yourself, follow these steps both mentally and physically.
To finish, she shared a few ways to set boundaries. One of my favorites was the three-part statement. Try using this template next time you need to set a boundary with someone: state the behavior, say how it makes you feel, and state the desired outcome. For example, if your college roommate is constantly leaving their clothes on the floor, try saying: Hey (name), when you leave all of your clothes on the floor, it makes the room feel messy. Can you please clean them up more often?
Jade confided, “The biggest thing I took away from this session was probably setting boundaries, because I have had a really hard time setting boundaries for myself lately, and it allowed me to see different ways to say no, specifically. It’s one of the biggest boundaries that I’ve had difficulty with.”
Keynote speaker: Grounded and Centered Leadership by Michelle Greenfield
To finish off the event, we heard from the keynote speaker, Michelle Greenfield, on Grounded and Centered Leadership. She is the co-owner of Third Sun Solar in Athens, a pioneer in solar energy product installation and development, and is a yoga instructor. She started the session with a grounding exercise 1:1 breathing. Try it: close your eyes. Place your feet firmly on the floor. Roll your neck slowly. Inhale one second. Exhale one second. And repeat three times.
Michelle then described how self-care is not selfish, not escapist, and you don’t need to buy it. It is an internal exercise, not necessarily an external exercise. Michelle shared, “Stress is not bad for you… It’s what motivates us.” She continued, “The goal is not to get rid of all the stress… The goal is to cultivate inner resources.”
As she continued, she shared that there are two branches in the brain: the sympathetic and parasympathetic. The sympathetic is what activates our fight or flight reaction, that shot of adrenaline through the veins. The parasympathetic branch is what makes us feel calm and relaxed. Located in the parasympathetic branch is the vagus nerve. It’s a nerve that wanders all over the body and is key to de-stressing.
To activate the nerve, we can use different breathing exercises. Different exercises include:
- Physiological breathing: 2 quick inhales and 1 long exhale. She had everyone in the room do this one together. I thought, Wow, it felt like every woman took a collective breath. Inhale. Exhale. Breathe. Destress. Repeat three times.
- Longer exhale: Inhale for 4 seconds. Exhale for 6 seconds. Repeat three times.
- 3-part breath: Picture your breath moving through three parts of your body. It starts in the pit of your stomach, reaches the middle of your lungs and comes out through your mouth. Inhale. Exhale the reverse. Repeat three times.
- Box breath: Inhale 4 seconds, hold the breath for 4 seconds, exhale 4 seconds, and hold 4 seconds. Repeat three times. (Fun fact: this is the technique that the Navy Seals use in high-pressure situations.)
Her last suggestion was to create a To-Don't list. Do you like To-Do lists as much as I do? Try making a To-Don't list of not watching more than three hours of TV or not opening social media until after work or classes. Then check it off your list. It feels amazing.
Veronica shared with me a few days after the event, “I really appreciated all of the techniques that Michelle Greenfield taught us in that short period of time. I have used the 'twice breathe-in, breathe-out' technique every day since!”
When Michelle finished leading the session, we all took another collective breath. Here we were, strong women, learning about energy and work and stress and community and we were doing it all together. I left feeling the most relaxed I had in a long time.