1.  Her dress was pink in color. [[avoid redundancy]]

2.  That society is an interesting one. [[avoid deadwood]]

3.  Having just finished college myself, I can testify that mental discipline is the greatest asset a college student can have while he's at school.

4.  Probably the Encyclopedia Britannica would provide one with the choicest information since it spends almost five pages expounding upon Shelley.

5.  There is no doubt that Ellen looked as though she were not feeling well. [[avoid negative phrasing]]

6.  In my opinion it is not an incorrect assumption that he is wrong.

7.  The main portion of the story dealt with Robert Peel's political life, an aspect of his life that was very active. [[avoid repetition that doesn't emphasize or clarify]]

8.  A Farewell to Arms was the novel which really first made Hemingway a commercial success. [[avoid weak intensifiers]]

9.  There were crowds of people milling about. [[avoid anticipatory phrases ... I hope that this, above all others, is the one you will learn to root out]]

10.  The reason that he voted for the independent candidate was that she had an antiwar record. [[introductions using "that" are often unnecessary]]

11.  At an early stage in his career, Pete Rose met a coach who kept urging him to go and analyze his motions while he was up at the plate